Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Spending Time With Your Children

"Children and parents spend a lifetime trying to see eye to eye and when they finally do, there is very little time left appreciate it."

The other evening, while watching television, I came across the above statement. Before I forgot what it was, I picked up a pencil and piece paper and wrote it down. I suppose that, as a parent, I know how it feels to lock horns with my children and unless we learn to compromise, we remain locked for way too long to the point that days, months or even years go by.

My daughter and I were in that position for most of her high school career and I regret it to this day. Fortunately, as she became mature and older and I became just plain older, we found a way to see eye to eye... well, for the most part.

This is a good thing since now we can concentrate on the positive things in life instead of the little things that can grow to an unbearable weight.

I want to be able to spend the rest of my life enjoying my children without constantly disagreeing with them. If there is anything that I have learned from my daughter it is that she has a heck of a lot to offer this world and I, being a part of this world and most certainly a part of her life, can benefit from her, not only as my daughter, but also as a person I can now see eye to eye with.

I suppose that the moral to this story is... "Don't waste time disagreeing with them when instead you could spend time loving them."

Something for all of us to consider!


HeiressChild said...

hi dave, i agree with you, especially that last statement. when my daughter was home growing up, especially during her high school years and her college breaks, i really tried to focus on that because i knew one day, she'd be gone from our home into her own. she's now married and living in california, and i really miss her, but i'm glad i enjoyed her more when she was here than locking horns with her. we used to do a lot together. i wonder if she misses me too....just a thought.

Dave said...

Take comfort heiresschild...She misses you.

Janice Thomson said...

You are so right Dave - I think as parents we sometimes want our kids to be exactly like us and in doing so we take away a wonderfully unique human being. I see a lot of parents who do not get along with their kids but I believe the onus is on us to understand and guide our children, not try to tell them how they should always do things our way. To not let them make their own mistakes is to deny them the right to grow and mature. Excellent post Dave.

HeiressChild said...

i've been on the phone with my daughter, and i shared your post with her. she did tell me she misses me and will probably move back this way in another 2-3 yrs as her job career is doing well there. thanks for your comforting words Dave.

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

Hope your daughter gets to read this post too.

abbagirl74 said...

I couldn't agree with you more. Makes you ponder the past, that's for sure.

Josie said...

Dave, I read somewhere that we don't own our children, we just borrow them for a little while. That's very true, isn't it? They are their own people, and sometimes they are very different from either of their parents. It does take a long time to respect that, and it's frustrating for them until we do. I remember thinking how different I was from my parents, but now that I'm older, I can see that I am really not.

Anonymous said...

We've always had our differences, but there's never been a point in my life when I didn't love my mom or dad.

I can't say that about ex-boyfriends. :)