Friday, February 15, 2008

My Son, His Girlfriend and His Grandfather

I have a seventeen year old son who generally walks around with a perma-grrrr on his face. According to my daughter, he is known to walk around school without even the remotest smile upon his face. He remains pretty much to himself. When his mother and I talk to him, he very seldom responds with much more than a nod or shake of the head and even then it is only a slight movement. He has never been one to become overly emotional or caring… until recently.

This past December, during the last few hours which my father was alive, my family and I were at his bedside. During this time, while my daughter and I stepped out to pick up something to eat and drink at the hospital coffee shop, my son asked if his mother would step outside the room as he wanted to be alone with his grandfather who was unconscious at the time. Upon stepping out of the room, she observed, through the glass doors, our son turning to his grandfather and proceeded to quietly speak to him and stroke his arm. After a short while, he leaned over and gave him a kiss.

Observing this brought tears to her eyes. I so wished that I could have observed my son during this time of final farewells. I wish I was there. It was a side to him that we had never seen before. Though I have often wondered what it was that he spoke to his grandfather about, I will never ask as it was something, no doubt, which was personal to him. One day when the opportunity arises, I will, however, reassure my son that, though his grandfather was unconscious, I am confident that he heard each and every word that he shared with him.

These past couple of months, he has been dating this young lady by the name of Autumn. It is amazing how love can bring out the best in someone. We have seen this quiet, reserved young man transform into the most caring and attentive individual that we have ever seen. If there ever was time where I needed an example of how someone can affect another’s life, it is here.

Last night, my son and his mother prepared a Valentine’s Day supper for him and his girlfriend who is a vegan. This morning he was up at the crack of dawn baking her some blueberry muffins. This evening, he will be serving her vegan lasagna on our finest china and utensils. Now to most of you, making lasagna may be quite easy and inexpensive but when you factor in that you can’t have any meat, milk or any other animal products, it can get a little more difficult and costly… But he pulled it off.

So… tonight, I will make myself scarce as he shares his Valentine's Day meal with his girlfriend. His mother is staying at home, though well out of the way, just in case there is a food crisis.

I often wondered how my son would turn out and just recently, I think I now have a fair idea judging from the brief glimpses of him and I must say that I am very pleased!


Seemu said...

This is a lovely blog!

I enjoyed reading it! Love indeed is a very powerful emotion that can bring out the best in people!

Take care and do keep writing such wonderful blogs...


Lone Grey Squirrel said...

Congrats! Your son seems to be turning into the kind of man every father can be proud of.

Jazz said...

Obviously you and Mrs. Dave have done a great job with him. That always rises to the surface.

Besides, I've never met an adolescent who didn't spend years in a state of perma-grrrr .

A Happy Downtowner said...

Lovely post Dave, your son is a fine human being, you and your wife have done a great job in raising him. I'm sure the dinner turned out perfectly, how can it not be? vegan lasagna served in fine china!

Gypsy said...

What a lovely and touching post. That is sad that you didn't get to witness your son saying goodbye to his grandfather. I'm sure it would be one of those moments in your life that you would never ever forget.

Sounds like it could be love with your son and Autumn (what a beautiful name) and I do hope their dinner was everything he hoped for.

alicesg said...

Oh Dave, that is a very heart warming and touching story. I am sure your son will grow up to be a good fine man. Thanks for sharing.

Hammer said...

I was the same with the perma grr but it was more of a self defense mechanism.

Sounds like he turned out pretty darn good.

geewits said...

Ages 17 to 19 are always tough as the child is trying so hard to distance themself from their parent. He will be your fun best friend in about 3 or 4 years. It sounds like you are doing everything right.

Akelamalu said...

Eventually the man inside the boy emerges. Wonderful isn't it! :)

Wanda said...

What a lovely story. Our kids have a way of growing up and pleasantly surprising us.

I'm sure you and your wife have done a good job raising him.

Sandy said...

Isn't it great when the boy becomes a man.. Great read!!


BBC said...


monsoon-dreams said...

very touching,dave.i love the way you write.god bless you and your sweet family.

heiresschild said...

how could he not turn out any other way except wonderful with a parents like you and his Mom! i know his girlfriend really enjoyed her valentine surprise dinner!

Mother of Invention said...

That is indeed encouraging! Amazing what a little love can do. My sister is noticing the same thing in her 21 year-old son with his first serious girlfriend, and believe me, this can be nothing but good for this lad!

jAMiE said...

He sounds like a lovely young his father i bet!

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